How The Indie Philosophy Will Save Africa

I've returned to my Indie hub after my Indie detox in Africa. There have been some nice revelations that have come from my seemingly anti-Indie experiences in and around the Pretoria suburbs. Now i shall share with you my discoveries.

Africa has problems; Health, Crime and Dictatorships are certainly up there. As we know for the vast majority of problems in Africa there are at least 30 groups (charity or otherwise) that are working effortlessly at combating these. this has brought my attention to the lack of support groups aimed at the chronic state of Indie apathy throughout the continent.
Some (perhaps uneducated) people may think that with all of the other apparently "more serious" problems in Africa that focusing any sort of time on the devastatingly disturbing disinterest in Indie Philosophy would be a waste of time and even perhaps insulting. I shall now enlighten them to only a few of the many benefits of bringing the Indie Philosophy to troubled Africa.

Case Study 1)
Imagine an everyday Indie follower; full of life, vigour, greeting each day with a sense of quiet optimism, that perhaps there will be a question on "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" about Of Montreal, or a band equally likely to stump an audience that until that point, had felt that "General Knowledge" would get them out of even the toughest spots.
Now put this guy in an African nation that perhaps is going through a some sort of political turmoil.
Now what is this guy most likely to do?:

a) Join an anti-government guerilla group?



Ans)
Not likely. What if the guerilla group actually overthrows the establishment! it'll be in the same region of pain that any Indie follower would feel after losing a great Indie band to Universal Records. No self respecting Indie fan would set themselves up for that kind of punishment.

b) Lock themselves away until it all blows over?



Ans)
I don't think so. this would mean that you would run the risk of missing any number of charity festivals aimed at bringing peace to your particular region. Worst case scenario being that while in your basement exile, Pavement suddenly reform and play at the local refuge camp. Followed of course by the band re-realizing that Stephen Malkmus is still a jerk and promptly breaking up again.

c) Leave the country?



Ans)
Of course not! They would of course stay true to the knowledge that despite the ruling governments recent indiscretions, their early stuff was pretty good and enjoy reminding people of that, as well as holding out hope that maybe before being overthrown, they could release at least one policy that reminds you how good they were before they got famous and corrupt (despite the grave unlikelihood).

d) Campaign for a secure middle-of-the-road political party.



Ans) BINGO! Any self respecting Indie person would gladly align themselves with a pretty decent political party (Assuming the party has very little real support or funding). Mainly due to the fact that in Africa middle-of-the-road parties have had little history of success. BUT! eventually like all things great and Indie, it'll be discussed. non-Indie folk will find out and tell other non Indie folk until the party has gained support from the majority at which point the original fans will leave the party sighting reasons like "They were great in smaller venues" and "The new manifesto isn't a patch on their early ones".

Result: The party takes power, the country is stabilized and it had the hard work and doctrine of the Indie folk to thank for it.